Five Song Friday: My Sincere Ape-ology
This Week: Bucket Funk, Donkey Punk and Fuzz Buddies
I didn’t mean to call you a big stupid monkey.
That was rude and I’m sorry.
But it’s been a hell of a week at work.
It was hot outside. My blood sugar was low.
I was probably too drunk to be at the zoo.
Then you did that thing where you scratch your bottom and sniff your fingers, and the words just kind of… slipped out.
I KNOW you’re an ape and not a monkey.
I KNOW it’s unfair to judge your actions in the context of human societal norms.
I KNOW you have feelings.
I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Humans hurt each other like this all the time, and when we do, we try to fix it by saying things like “it wasn’t you, it was me.”
We call each other names because we’re unhappy with ourselves. We attack because sometimes it’s easier than showing love.
Do you understand? Sometimes it seems like you really do.
Even if you can’t process the words, it feels like you’re reacting to the emotion behind them. Honestly, there are times when I can almost see your soul reflected in those big brown eyes.
Oh wow. Was that a smile you just gave me?
It’s as if our connection was deeper than the divide between species. Deeper than this pane of plexiglass. Deeper than…
GODDAMNIT.
Really?
You were pooping?
The whole time I was talking to you?
Fantastic.
Now you’re turning your back on me to admire your work.
That’s great. Good job. Super proud of you.
OH NO. NO NO NO.
DON’T DO IT.
Okay. So gross.
Yes, I see. Very nice! So BIG. So freakishly big.
Now please put it back down.
Can you put it DOWN? We were having a conversation.
Or… smear it on the glass. That’s an option too, I guess.
Oh yeah, really push it around. Now smack it with your palm and laugh hysterically.
Good. Amazing. So fun!
Look, this was supposed to be me coming to you to apologize.
I wanted to be sincere and say sorry and see if we could start over.
But clearly this is a bad time and you’re not in the mood to have a serious conversation.
Not a problem. I’ll come back next week.
For the record? That was super disgusting.
But I probably deserved it.
Five Song Friday 111
“Ain’t Right” - Boulevards
Some have called this music “Southern Fried Funk.” Not to be confused with “Kentucky Fried Funk,” which is a serious medical condition that comes after eating too much chicken from a bucket.
“Get Back OTG” - PowerSolo
What does “Donkey Punk” from Denmark sound like? It sounds like this.
“Tigre” - Jarina De Marco
The legend of Jarina De Marco starts in the Dominican Republic, where she began life as a small baby. Later, she spent time in Brazil, finding musical inspiration from the languages and exotic sounds of the Amazon rainforest. Today, as an adult woman, she writes and produces her own music, in addition to handling all visual design and video direction. The lady also sings in four languages (English, Spanish, Portuguese, and French) and can speak to dolphins using only her mind.
“We Have Some” - Frustration
I have some frustration. We all have some frustration. That’s kind of the point… so we may as well sing about it!
“Sweet Dreams” - Fuzz On It
Full Disclosure: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, Fuzz and I were pals. It was back in grade school on Long Island. We shared a love for Star Wars and drawing winged horses and all that other goofy shit you love when it’s 1979 and everything is awesome. We lost touch when my family moved to Virginia. I grew up to be a writer who makes dumb jokes about pooping gorillas, while he has since become some kind of musical sorcerer who can make a guitar do this and his voice do that.
“ ‘Sailing’ is not a romantic song.” - Christopher Cross (Born May 3, 1951)
Thanks for reading!
Sincerely,
DJ CrankyPete