Five Song Friday: Taking Out the Head Trash
This Week: Dorky Wolves, Brazil Nuts and Air-Dried Meat
I know too much about the wrong kinds of things.
Dumb facts about worthless stuff.
Things that do me no good.
Unless you count convincing my mother-in-law I’d be great on Jeopardy!.
Or dropping obscure pop culture quotes during poker night.
“I learning it from watching YOU!” “I’d buy THAT for a dollar!” “SPARTACUS!”
Or always being the guy who can tell you the name of the actor faster than you can look it up on Google.
“Put your phone down. That’s Dermot Mulroney. Yes, I’m positive. You’re thinking of Dylan McDermott. Totally different guy.”
I know my “gift” sounds amazing, but lately it feels more like a burden.
And I don’t think I’m alone.
You probably know things you wish you didn’t.
These things aren’t horrible things or awful, secret things. They are commercial jingles. Celebrity relationship histories. The names of people who are paid to tell you that it’s raining outside.
We’re all under siege thanks to vast armies around the globe who are working full time to fill our heads with junk. At every hour of the day, content producers are hitting “publish” and “send.”
We get updates and dings and buzzes and bings.
That little window in the upper right corner of your computer pops in to say hello and share the latest about nail trends, the Mediterranean diet and Harry Hamlin.
“The number of people with whom I’ve been intimate is not very many — I marry them, mostly. Probably the first couple [of marriages] were me trying to work stuff out because they had characteristics that were similar to my mother.” - HH
See what happened? I just did it to you.
Now we BOTH know that Harry Hamlin had mommy issues.
I am so sorry.
Once upon a time, there were limits. Newspapers and magazines had deadlines and a finite number of column inches. There were only three television networks and they all went to static at the end of the night.
That old-fashioned deluge of information was like a pleasant summer shower.
Today it feels more like getting waterboarded with Diet Coke.
In addition to hundreds of channels streaming services, there is an impossibly huge digital universe of white space that humanity seems determined to fill.
Watch a basic cable channel. Open the “promos” tab of your email inbox.
Go to a “news” website and TRY to scroll to the bottom of the page (Spoiler Alert: There is NO bottom, just an aggressive stack of clickbait squares that replicate into infinity).
After 10 minutes, your brain will feel like George Costanza’s wallet.
Overstuffed and impractical. A disaster waiting to happen.
I don’t want my brain to explode on a busy New York street.
That’s why my New Year’s resolution is to stop paying attention to stupid stuff that doesn’t matter.
This year I’m going to replace the nonsense with knowledge. Fill my head with useful facts and skills that can help make a difference in the world.
In 2023, I’m making a solemn pledge to LEARN instead of CONSUME.
Right after I finish season two of The White Lotus.
Sincerely,
DJ CrankyPete
Five Song Friday 046
“MANIC PIXIE DREAM BOY” - Ray Laurél
I’ve heard of Manic Pixie Dream Girls. They’re the kind of quirky young ladies who show up in romantic comedies and, according to film critic Nathan Rabin, exist “solely in the fevered imaginations of sensitive writer-directors to teach broodingly soulful young men to embrace life and its infinite mysteries and adventures.”
They have cool hair and cool clothes and great taste in music. They don’t “play by the rules.” They ride motor scooters and do karaoke. And they make dorky male characters do that “AHH-OO-GAH” thing that cartoon wolves do when they see a beautiful woman.
I’m not sure what a Manic Pixie Dream BOY does. It’s probably the same thing, but much more… fabulous.
“I Wish” - Forro In The Dark featuring David Byrne
Man oh man does David Byrne like Brazilian music.
He released a compilation in 1989 called Brazil Classics 1: Beleza Tropical, which unsurprisingly was FULL of Brazilian music. And when Forro in the Dark started playing Brazilian music in NYC’s East Village in 2002, it was only a matter of time before David found out.
Rumor has it that the former Talking Heads lead singer was riding by on his bicycle when he realized that the Brazilian music coming from the club wasn’t the same Brazilian music playing in his headphones. He stopped immediately and rushed to join the band onstage.
Four years later, this song was loosed upon the world.
“Renegade” - Freedom Fry
Maybe YOU can resist a dreamy Styx cover song, but that is absolutely not the case for me.
“Hasta La Vista” - Dream Wife
Is there such a thing as a pop song that is TOO poppy?
I wondered about it and second-guessed myself like some kind of music snob who couldn’t just get over himself and enjoy the plucky guitar and silly lyrics like a normal person. I’m better now, thanks.
And I’m happy to share this delightful little song that might not change your life, but it will help you think about nothing serious for three minutes and 42 seconds.
“Salami” - Pretty Happy
Speaking of sandwiches… salami is the “that guy from that movie” of deli meats.
It’s never the star of a sandwich, but somehow it just shows up in everything and you aren’t mad about it.
Salami got sidelined. Pepperoni has that whole pizza gig. Prosciutto is all fancy and gets wrapped around stuff like mozzarella and melon. And back in my day, the kids used to go bonkers for baloney.
I’m hoping this song signals new era for salami. Maybe people will finally see salami as more than just cured sausage consisting of fermented and air-dried meat. Maybe it will get the respect it deserves.
Then again, this song does bring up baloney a lot. And there is a fair bit of screaming and chaotic guitar noise which may turn more people off than on. So… maybe not.
Sorry salami!
Listen on Spotify
Listen on YouTube Music
That’s all for now. Thanks for reading!
“Without music, life would be a mistake.” - Friedrich Nietzsche